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I don’t know what to do anymore. I reported a while ago on this forum about being in my 40’s, dealing with early stage breast cancer and parent with MS refusing to leave my home after a temporary stay before assisted living placement. Last minute my mother refused to go, and I started the eviction process. Well, things only got worse from there. With the help of a neighbor, my mother retaliated against me and accused me of emotional abuse. I was recently told by police to leave my own home after neighbor called police. The officer didn’t want to hear my side, just told me to get my things and leave. A restraining order was filed against me by mother with help from neighbor. My lawyer has told me to stay far away from my own home that I paid for and stick to the order to the letter. My lawyer has been handling things and told me not to communicate with my mother at all or for any reason. But she has been leaving me voicemails pleading with me to help her because since I have been ordered to leave my own home, the neighbor moved in her homeless daughter to care for my mother in “MY” home. Yes, my elder attorney believes my mother has been manipulated by my neighbor to take over my home. I don’t know what to do or feel anymore. Especially since every agency out there that is supposed to help me just attacks me and allows my mother to be taken advantage of. There are parts of me that hate this woman who was once my mother for stealing my house and giving it to someone else even temporarily. I have been told the eviction process might take up to a year. So that is a year I can’t live in my own house. Just venting here. Just feel so hopeless.

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Something doesn't seem right. There should have been a hearing for the restraining order. At that hearing you would have had the opportunity to present your side of the story - ideally, with the help of a qualified attorney (e.g. criminal law; domestic violence).

And, based on what you have shared above - things are definitely dramatic and chaotic. It doesn't sound to me like your elder law attorney is working out well for you in this situation.
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Sounds like some more detailed legal advice may be very important.
I cant pull up your past posts, so what is unclear is your Mom's decision making status. Is she still competent? If not, who is POA?
Besides eviction you may have some other options, but need the right legal advice.
Depending on your mom's status, financial assets and who is POA there may be avenues, including could you literally take rent from her assets/ estate while she is now at your house? Only good legal advice can answer this.
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Are you expected to pay the bills since u can't live there? Keep up the taxes. You will lose your house if you don't. But if the water bill is not paid where I live only allows it to go so far and they turn it off. Once it is turned off it then becomes a health problem and residents are not allowed to remain in the house.

Never understood how the homeowner gets kicked out of their own house when a person living with them places a complaint. That could be a BF/GF thing or just a roommate. I never understood protecting squatters either.
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I did a brief online search and see that an "experienced eviction lawyer for landlords" is what is recommended in your scenario.
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Follow the advice of your attorney. This will take time. Meanwhile you are down to a shelter or whatever, and that can only strengthen your case in court.
Meanwhile call APS yourself, open a case explaining what you did to us and giving them permission to contact your attorney. Tell them your Mother is in grave danger now with a predatory (use that word) trying to take her care over in your absence. Report all phone calls recorded if you are able to APS. Keep a careful diary. These are usable in court.
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So sorry you are going through this. It's hard to make suggestions when we don't know enough about the legal details. However, I would say that your lawyer is telling you to follow the restraining order to the letter so that you don't get more charges filed against you.

Now you will have to pay for a place to live, and you will no longer be able to pay the bills for the house. (I would continue to pay the taxes, because when this mess is eventually over, you will still own the house). But APS should get your parents placed in a hurry once utilities and such are shut off.

Edit: Perhaps you can get a message to your mother through someone else to let her know that you are not legally allowed to communicate with her because of the restraining order. She may not even be aware of the gravity of what she has done yet. Maybe if you can get that message to her she will withdraw the restraining order.

Sorry you are going through this awful situation. My friend went through similar with a grifter, father's new "girlfriend", who got a restraining order against her so she couldn't come within something like 100 yards of her 90 y/o father.
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It would be helpful to know what state this is all happening in. Some states protect squatters... we can't give best advice if we don't know what state because they all have different laws and resources.
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It isn't the answer you want to hear, but maybe sell your home? Then she will have to get out and your neighbor won't be able to manipulate her (or you) anymore. I realize it's an extreme solution, but you seem to be in a no-win situation anyway. Or, you need a different lawyer.
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cwillie Jan 30, 2024
THIS
"you need a different lawyer."
Good luck selling with a difficult tenant that won't leave.
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I'm sorry I don't remember the first post you made here, so I'm not sure why some of us recommended "evicting" a disabled 90 year old with MS. That is never going to go over well with APS or the courts or the police. You should have gotten a social worker involved to help you and your mother find housing. I'm not sure what to advise now, maybe contact APS and have them do a wellness check?
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Oh my , I'm so sorry, my heart goes out to you. It's 530 am , way to early for me to say anything useful. But I just wanted to reach out to you, and say my heart goes out to you.
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