I did some research due to another poster asking if she could be charged with "abandoning" her elderly, mentally ill mom who previously resided in the OP's home. She is now the resident of a group home for the elderly, but APS has called and said they may charge her with abandonment.
This is a discussion regarding the laws in Arizona:
"Elder abandonment is one form of elder abuse. Elder abandonment is the abuse, neglect, or exploitation of an elderly person. In most cases, the victim is a vulnerable adult who is unable to take care of him or herself.
This type of elder abuse occurs when someone who has assumed responsibility to provide care to an elderly person deserts or abandons that person. When the caregiver abandons the elderly individual both purposefully and permanently, it is considered abandonment."
The statute in California specifically mentions dropping the elder at a hospital, NH or Assisted Living Facility.
This would seem to be a warning not to attempt caring for an Elder at home, yours or theirs.
Very helpful.
I spoke to my attorney today and because my mother is mentally incapacitated, I cannot simply withdraw as POA. The attorney advised that I would need to petition the court to assign guardianship because to simply withdraw could cause charges on me for abandonment.
My attorney said that I can do this myself, as it is fairly simple, and less costly then using an attorney. I hope these posts provide those considering "helping" their elders by moving them in and becoming POA, what exactly they are in for. I have taken on way more than I ever thought or imagined. Now I will be needing to go to court and file just to have myself removed from this responsibility. I will provide updates as I work through this process.
Take care.
So why do I feel so bad. I know I should not feel bad but I do. I called the APS rep and let her know about my mom's wishes in case that is good enough for them to let me resign and they can take it from there. But, I was only able to leave a voice mail. I will continue to provide updates.
I am so sorry that your mom is behaving this way. Of course, it hurts. How could it not hurt?
Be at peace knowing that you have done your very best.
Hugs!
I moved my mom into our home after she lost her home in hurricane Katrina. Trust me, it isn’t easier.
My mom was still fairly independent when she first moved in. She couldn’t drive but she didn’t even need a walker yet.
I was still able to work. I had time for my family and a social life because she could be left alone.
As her care needs progressed, I was devoting more and more time to her. I ended up quitting my job, which threw me into a deep depression.
My anxiety was through the roof from caregiving full time and losing all sense of who I was anymore.
So, when the time comes that your loved one’s care requires more than you can reasonably do, please consider facility care, because even with help from agency caregivers like I had, it becomes too difficult.
Just the sleepless nights alone are reason enough to stop being a full time caregiver. Sure, we went through sleepless nights with our children but children grow up and become independent!
Our elderly parents are going in the opposite direction and will eventually need more help than we can comfortably give.
We don’t bounce back as easily from those sleepless nights as we grow older.