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Just an update. Since my mini stroke, TIA or "funny turn" whatever you want to call it while driving I've been nervous to get behind the wheel, just going a short way along back roads to the village. Today, 2 weeks later, I went grocery shopping in the next town and I was fine.

I now take my phone off the hook at supper time and leave it off overnight. If my mother has a problem there are skilled staff on duty 24/7 and there's a hospital 4km away - I'll deal with it tomorrow. I don't know if I'll ever recover completely, but already I'm more calm and not living in fear and dread. Baby steps.
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Well done Ashlynne you have done the right and only thing for your own survival. It is well known that the abused can't let go of the abuser and in the case of children often protect them and deny the abuse. You will heal because you want to and you have seperated from your abuser and put yourself somewhere where she can't reach you, Of course there is guilt it goes with the teritory but you have done the best you can and in the end that is all that matters. She would not be any happier or receive better care if you were looking after her and soon won't even recognize you.
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Yes well done Lynne. Looking after you. I sure understand beating a hasty retreat when visiting. "You want something from the store, mother? I'll go right now." This visit I don't think I will see her at all as she hasn't been taking her juice with the meds in it, and I can't take any more of the paranoid accusations. We will see what the psych doc comes up with. I am getting tired of these trips...
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Veronica thank you.

Emjo do you have to go at all? It's so hard on you and puts you back to somewhere you don't want to be. Could you talk to the psych doc by Skype or some other means of teleconference? There are a lot of free programs/utilities for that purpose.
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Thanks Lynne. I have been doing that and may rely on that again. I do think it is good to meet these people face to face so we both know who we are dealing with. They are making some important decisions. These one I have not met before. I think part of it is that my friend is gone. She was a real comfort to me when I went down and I don't have any girlfriends there any more.
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It's not the same but we're always here for you. Hang in there girl!
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thx
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