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don't be too hard on yourself.  I don't know how old she is but my mother (now 93), about 3 years ago I went up to her house. we only live 2 hours apart, we had our grandkids over and said I think I will go up to check on mom. at that time I didn't go up every day cause she was getting around good.  Well, when I went up, I yelled hello and all I heard was "help"........here she was cleaning in the bathroom and lost her balance and fell into the tub sideways so there was no way she could get up.  I had to call hubby to come help me.  she did not hit her head but she was like that for 45 minutes (not near the amount of time your mom was lying on floor). Needless to say.....she started wearing her "life alert" necklace after that cause she never wanted to wear it before.    IF you don't have one of those alert things, now is the time to get it and make sure your mother wears it 24/7  (they are waterproof - at least my mom's is).  Things will happen and we can't always be around to prevent things.  Just be glad you did go over when you did.  And maybe now if you don't go over every day.......at least call her at a certain time each day.  I am glad they are doing a scan because as we get older our brains shrink some and any bang to the head can cause problems.  I hope she will be okay and again don't blame or feel guilty.......you did find her.
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elaine1962
Oct 30, 2020
Update- having our meeting soon. I’m going to ask if she can stay at the hospital. They called me to come to the hospital at 9:30am. She took a turn for the worse.

elaine1962
Oct 30, 2020
" my mother only has a few days, or weeks to live. She suffered a severe stroke and pneumonia in one lung. She is receiving comfort care at the hospital but they can’t keep her for weeks."

elaine1962
Oct 30, 2020
Update- Thankfully if she needs to be moved to a facility with hospice, it won’t happen until Monday at the earliest.

Not eating or drinking and unresponsive. I don’t want to move her. I’m going to tell hospice that. My brother coming at 3:00. I hope he makes it in time. She appears to be in a coma. I can’t stop crying.

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Elaine,
Your caregiver friends are here to comfort you at this very sad, difficult time.
💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞
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I wish people would read an entire thread...
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As a long-distance caregiver for mom,I once asked a fellow parishioner who runs a caregiver agency what's the most useful thing she implemented for her elderly mom who lived independently. She said "Nestcam" cameras. I took her suggestion and had 4 camera put into my mom's home. Now I and my sibs can monitor her, esp if she doesn't pick up the phone when we know she is supposed to be home. After 2 years, she's finally wearing her Life Alert necklace, and has part-time home aide. We know that we'll need to assess her living situation constantly and adjust it as needed.

As I said, it took 2 years to get to this place. It took a sudden hospitalization (which mom recovered from) to get mom and sibs to align on a plan.
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elaine1962,

I just read this entire thread. You’re surrounded in spirit and love by many. Many of us feel your pain as we have gone through an all-too similar situation.

I lost my father almost two years ago- I, too, found him lying on the carpet. I cried as I read your words. He lived in his own home, on his own terms, until 97.

Please allow yourself to cry. Tears heal. It’s ok. I don’t know you, but I do feel your pain. I pray for peace for you and your family.
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elaine: I am in much prayer for you and your sweet mother. I am so very sorry that she's suffered a steoke.
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Elaine, I am so sorry about your dear mom. My thoughts and prayers are with your mom, and family during this most difficult time. Very stressful situation. Thank God you found her and got her the help she needed. Hospice should intervene and try to keep your mom at the hospital. I know my mothers hospital has a special unit for hospice patients and a special room for patient and family. Talk to the nurse manager and she what she can do. Wishing your mother much comfort and peace.
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Elaine....just want you to know you and your mother are lifted up in prayers by so many caring people in this “family”. You have always done your very best to help your mom, please dont “what if?” yourself in to a nervous breakdown. Take care of you as much as you can now. We are all here for you! Much love....Liz
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UPDATE- My mother died this morning 12:15am. My brother got in at 4:00pm and we stayed with her when she passed.

Cant stop crying. Thank you everyone for your well wishes. I appreciate all of you so much!!!

She died at the hospital 10/31/2020 12:15am.
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I am so, so sorry. I am new here and I have learned so much from your posts and I thank you for sharing so well with us. Please accept my sympathies.
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elaine - big hugs to you...

Have a good cry for the loss of your mother. She lived her life the way she wanted. I truly believe, correction, I know when we die, we leave our bodies behind and move on to another realm, a better place, free of pain and we are whole again. Your mother is there now, with her loved ones waiting and welcoming her. You will see your mom again.

Much love to you elane.
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Elaine so sorry. My heart breaks for you. I am relieved she went quickly. I am so glad both you and your brother were with your dear mom when she passed. My thoughts and prayers are with you and family. I am glad she did not linger too long. She is at peace now and in a better place. Please take care of yourself. Sending you a hug.
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Elaine, I am so sorry.
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Oh, Elaine

I am sorry for the loss of your mom. I am so very glad that your brother was there with you.

Death is never easy to accept even if we expect it. There are so many emotions that run through our minds.

You will grieve and it’s completely normal to grieve.
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My sympathies and prayers to you and your family at this very difficult time. Allow yourself the space and time to grieve but know that your Mom lived her life well and that she loved and continues to love you and the family
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Elaine
I am so sorry for your loss. Glad your brother is with you.
Hugs
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Elaine, I’m very sorry, prayers for peace and comfort for you and your family
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Dear "Elaine1962,"

When I didn't see an update earlier, I had a sinking feeling that your mom had passed away. I thought I'd check one more time -

I'm so very sorry and many, many tears from members of the forum are being shed along with yours. I am very thankful that your brother did make it in time and the two of you were beside her in her final moments.

May God heal your broken heart as the grieving process begins.

Sending you a hug...
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elaine1962: I am so very sorry to learn of your mother's passing. I send you deepest condolences and virtual hugs. That was good that your brother came. Again, I am so sorry. I hope that we may be of some comfort to you here on the forum.
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So sorry for the loss of your Mom, Elaine.
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((((Elaine))))

There are no words.💔

Rest in God's comfort.
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I’m so sorry for your loss, Elaine.
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Dear Elaine, be comforted by your warm memories of your mom in the good years. ((((((Hugs)))))))).
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I am so sorry to hear about your mom. Sending you hugs and prayers.
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I am so very sorry for your loss. (((Hugs))).
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I’m very sorry for your loss. May God give you comfort during this very difficult time.
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I'm sorry Elaine, you have my sympathy.
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Dear Elaine,

We mourn with you, as many of us walked this path recently. You have our sympathy and understanding. You are surrounded by love.
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I'm very sorry for the loss of your mother. May you receive peace in your heart.
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