You just have to laugh sometimes.....
Some of my recent favourites are:
"I had a terrible night last night. I had to stay awake .. until I went to sleep" (said several times over, with greater emphasis each time, because of course if you repeat it, then it must make sense.)
"drinking water causes gas, so no water, and no salt, cause salt makes you drink water"
"the toothpaste took all the enamel off my teeth in just 3 days!"
We were at her assisted living place, and she never had any idea what was on TV unless it was Andy Griffith or Murder She Wrote. She was always trying to find "Andy of Mayberry", even if it was 4 in the morning and she had on the Spanish channel.
One day we were over there, and a Viagra commercial was on. It was a happy couple running around on the beach and all of that. And of course, the announcer was talking about erections lasting more than 4 hours...
She said, "Well I don't know what I've got on the TV here. Oh! This must be the basketball game!"
So now every time I see a viagra commercial, I say, "Oh, the basketball game is on!"
Another time, we watched M*A*S*H over there, and my grandma said, "Oh, this is that awful show with that man who dresses like a lady! I've always hated this show!" But then a few minutes later, she was enjoying it immensely.
Miss you and love you, dad.
My Mom , who has vascular dementia from a brain stem stroke and can barely talk now, surprised me last month while on vacation. We were listening to music and I asked her who her favorite musician was -not really thinking she could give me a very good answer but hoping anyway-- and , no kidding, she whispered Pat Benetar!! I almost spit my beer out! I love Pat!!! I high fived her - and she me- I think it is because she used to Jazzercise a lot in the 80's and 90's! But after all these years I still learn something new about my Mom. "She's a real tough cookie with a long history......"hee hee
My Mom then informed our friend that SHE invented the term ! We laughed a while on that one.
Dad "What's that"
me " Peg is coming at 4"
Dad What's that"
me louder "Peg is coming at 4"
Dad "I can't hear you"
me louder still" Peg is coming at 4"
Dad "stop shouting at me"
The next day, she came to me all excited, but a little confused. She said that my dad had stopped by that same pool table and, "He didn't play like we did. He used a looooong stick."
Then one day, he found the problem:
"I know why I cannot sleep at night. It's because my eyes are wide open."
Dad-"I think the idea is very believable, more like what the colonists did to the American Indians, it didn't turn out so well for them though... now could you all talk amongst yourselves... I need to sleep."
Just as I'm getting to turn the channel, he said, "Hey, I saw 2 ladies naked. I think I saw them naked. It looked liked they were naked. I tried to see and it changed." I had to explain at least twice that they ARE walking around naked. Everyone living there goes around naked.
He said, "Oh, good. I thought there was something wrong with my eyes."
But the other day, I took her to be interviewed at the local Memory Clinic and the looks on face at some of the things they suggested she might do and their responses -- all were so priceless.
They were suggesting different activities to her and when they mentioning "cooking classes" the most sour horrible look came over her face and she was REALLY glaring at them. It was pretty funny and I had to explain to her that no-one was going to make her cook. She then just looked so relieved -- all of us, including her, got kind of a laugh about that.
lol, @ boni,
turn on the garbage disposal and give that " rat on acid " a nice slippery bubble bath..