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This has been most helpful.
I am 1 of 3 children who love our 85yr old Mom dearly.
I am the oldest & have beeen building a new house for 10 mos. to retire early, downsize & to take my mom in. She recently had a scare and I rushed from VA to Fla to help. She currently lives alone after our dad passed 4 years ago tomorrow😞
My sister is near by and checks on her everyday before work & after- plus do activities together on weekends-- we have cameras set up in her home and she has to text ( group feed) each day when she rises and goes to bed at the very least- I am the care giving type and text her all through out day too! We also have an app that tells us when she leaves home and arrives-
Anyway, This scare was pretty serious. She felt sick and didn’t show up for a “ fun date”. That person went to check on her and she hadn’t been eating- forgot to eat and drink for several days while the younger daughter was away (5 days)(unbeknownst to me ) so , I left Immediately to fla- turned out to be a serious UTI - a culture showed a strain that was all antibiotic resistant except one as well.
So she is getting better by very slow- this was close call- A CT(only because we didn’t know what the tummy pain was at first) showed many other organ enlargements-
So, now she is moaning all the time and it’s very loud-
Not at night ( as I was in the next room and moved into her bed because it was so disturbing I thought it would be better comfort if I was closer-so glad I did- from the above mention—
Thanks for all the wonderful advice- I’m sure she misses dad, is lonely for same age company and feels that being alone is just too much- she was an extremely busy/ out going lady- and while dad was alive- & sickly she took care of him- after he passed her care of another was promptly removed -
We moved her out of the family home to a MUCH smaller place and it has no office/ craft room and that is her passion- we have her going to classes- the place she didn’t show up too!!
So this recent moan is probably all of the above mentioned-

She is probably I n some slight physical pain- ( even though she claims she isn’t)
Has some fear of the unknown future- missing dad-
For sure inner pain-
loss of hope-
Some stressor recent move and now again from an area she spent 39 years & of what might be wrong with her tummy-
Any of her recent expierence could also be so shocking all of the sudden as those experiences /loss of her 55 yr marriage with her first and only love of her life-( and dad was even more outgoing then she is)
Also, loss of love/ companionship is huge-
I’m going to be taking her in to our new place and a new state for us all - start fresh in a new place with family- me , my husband and my moms brother- who lost his spouse 2 months after she did) there I hope she finds comfort in a group of ages who are very fond of her-
Thank you all- especially shining eyes!
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